Archive for the Family Category

Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials.

Posted in A fresh start, Family on February 8, 2009 by navasha123

I think its time to share my a little about my mom. Shes been through a alot with me and the amazing thing about her is that there is never a task to great when it comes to her kids.

I went there today to gain a little more courage and some love. Yes I admit it I am a mommies girl and I run to my mommy for love and attention.

Today I needed love more than anything. It was great to be able to curl up in her arms just for a hug. It reminds me of when I was little she would lay on her bed and I would go lay down beside her and put my head her on chest. It was so peaceful listening to her breathing and the soft beating of her heart. There was something very soothing about that ritual. Its amazing how five little words change so many things. When I really feel like I just cant keep going anymore I just need my mother to say  ‘Its going to be okay’. Some how she is always right, its like she just knows.

I love coming back from her place. Right now I feel like I have what it takes to face the world again. I love my mommy. Plus She gave me a water cooler and a Pilate’s DVD LOL.

It’s OK to have butterflies in your stomach. Just get them to fly in formation.

Posted in ADHD, Family, Learning on February 4, 2009 by navasha123

We had to make a decision a few hours ago. It was not an easy one to make and honestly the only thing that is going to make me change my mind is if I loose faith in what I am about to do. Why is it always easier to have faith in others and always so much more difficult when you need to believe in yourself.

I have been okay with making choices that impact me but some how I always second guess myself when it comes to my children. Its hard to make choices for others when you know that the choices you make will have an impact on their lives forever. If I look back on the research I have done thus far I can honestly say that the choices I am making are informed ones. When we decided to go this route we were sure this was in our babies best interests.

I suppose that at this point the best thing to do is take that leap of faith and see which way it goes. I know I will have to brace myself for comments and snide remarks.Its already started coming in waves from our own family. Lets hope we have the strength to ride these waves as a family. This could just be the test we need.

Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you’re just a reflection of him?

Posted in Dad, Family, Reflection Time, Time together on February 2, 2009 by navasha123

I was going to post about Vaughn staying at home today, how  it was quite a blessing for me since today I was rather busy.

I was going to share how impressed I am with how he managed to play house day on his day off and how he started by getting Jasmyne ready for school. How he remembered the show and tell and managed to give Jazz a good explanation on weavers  and their nests and then still packed the swimming gear before heading off to school! He even managed a brief meeting with her teacher about our idea on using a stress ball in class during lessons and how we believe it could help in class.

I probably would have gone into detail about I arrived to CLEAN HOUSE, the lasagna was in the oven baking, Jasmyne had put together the garlic rolls and Abigail was in the process of setting the table.

If I had not turned on the TV when I did I would have probably gone into detail about making a dash to the school for the first PTA meeting, which left Vaughn to help Jazz finish her home work, make sure both kids brushed teeth and read to them before bed.

But I did turn on the TV when I did and what I saw numbed me to the core. Oprah had a show about super moms who make mistakes not just burn the toast before breakfast mistakes. Mistakes that cost lives. Mistakes that can not be fixed no matter how super these moms are. I was busy packing my bags to run out to my meeting when something in me just said stop. I walked over to the TV and slowly felt my bag slipping to the floor. I was still listening with one ear on the TV and the other on the kids when I realised I was probably watching myself on TV. A me that had managed to get lucky thus far. I do try be all that, I work hard at being the best mom I can be the bar has been set very high by ME and only me.

It was one of those fluorescent light bulb moments for me as I realised that joining the PTA this year would not be a good choice. No one would benefit from this choice. My kids dont need a mother who can do it all they need a mother who can love them more. It was so easy to understand that how come I had never seen it before!

So I wont join the PTA this year I will rather spend my evenings at home reading books to my girls and baking muffins. At school functions I wont be the mother selling tickets and refreshments I will be the mother in the photos with my children! When it comes to rasing funds I will be the mother who hands over R50 to the school and runs off to play with the kids. And guess what? There will be no guilt not one inch. And you know why? Beacuse I know I have made my choices and the real super moms of the world have made theirs. So tonight I am packing up my cape, for good. Who wants to be a super hero anyway ….

Beware of those who would use violence, too often it is violence they want and neither truth nor freedom.

Posted in Best friend, Family, Girls Time on January 30, 2009 by navasha123

Jasmyne and I spent the evening together this evening.  Her school picnic had been moved due to the rain so she was feeling rather disappointed.

We sent dad off to go see his friends and then made a huge bowl of popcorn and put on a movie. Honestly Igor is not a kids movie and I really wish I had watched it before I put it on for her. I sincerely hope that this movie was not aimed at the childrens’ target market when it was made. Everything was about being evil and destruction. I ended up turning it off half way as Jasmyne and I had lost interest. Once Jasmyne was sleeping I managed to finish the movie. It was painful.

I am honestly stunned at what movies are being produced for children. Its mostly adult humor and the violence in them is terrible. Since when did it become acceptable practice to blow up as many things as possible in a childrens movie? Is that meant to be entertaining? Really?

I wish these animators and producers would wake up, with the amount of power they have one would think that they have the opportunity to change the world in their animation. There was a time where people all over the world were fighting for peace. Now war has taken over and its all we see and experience. Its rather tragic.

The movie starts off with the scientist blowing himself up. Strike One . There is a scene in Igor where the monster has an opportunity to be brain washed to be an axe murderer. Strike Two. They have some stupid suicidal rabbit who cant die  yet he keeps trying to! Strike Three. I have many strikes on this movie but these three really stand out in my mind. I am not even going to go in to how distasteful I found it to use the musical annie in the last fight sceen or how laughing at blind orphans is supposed to be funny?

And we wonder why children are so messed up. This is not the first movie or TV series that has had me sitting there mouth wide open. Bolt came pretty close with its action sceen. This just happens to be the last straw movie. I am most certainly going to make a concered effort to screen all the movies the kids watch from now on.

Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen

Posted in Family, Garden, Girls Time, Reflection Time, Time together on January 25, 2009 by navasha123

Today was our creative day, we made cute little chicken pies.  Just a simple premade puff pastry and chicken mixture that we cut out in to little hearts and stars and filled . Jasmyne was over the moon when she got home from church. She cant wait to have one for lunch at school.

I made today abigails day. We were up early to go on our first girls shopping trip, just the two of us hunting for finger paints .I put her table and chair out into the sunny garden. Abigail absolutely had a ball this was all very new to her, these strange things in bottles that tasted funny. Once she got going,she painted the paper, she painted herself, she painted the table and chairs and then she painted me.

I learned two things about Abigail today firstly she loves the colour red and secondly if given the opportunity she does not mind getting dirty! I was starting to wonder about her but it turns out she loves getting messy.

We ended the day with a stir fry for my mother in law, it was her birthday dinner. I enjoyed having the whole family around it was great to catch up with them.

Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into.

Posted in Family, Saving Money on January 24, 2009 by navasha123

Today was grocery shopping day, a day that should have been like every other shopping day. I was armed with my trusty high lighter and list of what to buy, I was ready for an estimated total. I was in a state of shock when they gave me the total. Normally I shop for the month with a budget, today the budget went out the window. At first I thought they had rung up something twice in fact I was sure they had accidentally pressed the double or nothing button they store under the till for candid camera moments like this. After the initial shock wore off I paid and glumly pushed my trolleys to the car. I still felt rather down when I got home. it was really not how I had planned my day. I had no idea that food prices had gone up so drastically since my last shop back in November.

While I was unpacking I realised something. I was unpacking food that I could afford for my family.The cost of food has upset me, but that’s life the only thing you know will always be the certain are death and taxes the rest is a total guess especially food prices!

The important part is that although they are what they are at least I can feed my family. My mind wondered to the families who do battle. Its not about how on earth they manage but that so many do and they don’t complain. I suppose it comes down to appreciation. We all want to drive big luxury cars and live in great big fancy houses but in majority cases that’s not a reality so its up to us to appreciate what we can do and what we do have. Its seems like the days of fabluous dinners are drawing to an end. I think its time to get that vegtable garden to really work for us.

Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding the third

Posted in Family, Letting those who matter know, Sad on January 20, 2009 by navasha123

Today started like any other day would. We woke up, got ready dropped the kids off and kissed them goodbye. I remember asking Jasmyne to please pack her jersey in her bag. I remember that I gave Abigail a piece of date cake before breakfast. I remember that the drive to work was rather quiet for no particular reason, it was just quiet. I do not remember saying I love you to Abigail, I am sure I would have I always say it but today I don’t remember saying it.

Work was pretty much the same start up the computer, make some tea, open emails and have breakfast. As the people start arriving greet everyone and talk about what was interesting the night before. We were all outside having our morning smoke break when Sams phone rang. The sudden ash white colour of  her skin gave the conversation  away. What we were told confirmed our worst fears. Something had happened.

Its incredible how it almost feels like time has grounded to a halt, your body goes ice cold and the sounds of the voices around you become nothing dim background noise. All that you can hear are the hard thuds of your heart beat as you try to make sense of was just said. Its always the key words that stand out there was an accident, he may not make it, surgery, lost arm, pregnant wife, head injury, ICU.  As you start coming out of that numbed zoned out state, adrenaline takes over. Reality sinks in and you just know that this is not a dream or some very bad practical joke, this is really happening and you may just loose a friend today. Fear seems to start with a focal point. Like a spider web each thought, links to the next and grows. Sometimes you find yourself trapped in a double web.

After we heard the news about our friend my grandfather called. My grandmother who has been in the hospital for the passed week had been rushed to ICU. When its closer to home your emotions race a little faster at first. You wonder when the last time was that you hugged her, when was the last time that you told her you loved her, If you have ever told her that she has always been the most special person in the world, to you . Your mind moves back to when you were 5 and upset and she held you so tight that you wished she would never let you go and you wonder if she remembers that and treasures that moment like you do.

Life does change regardless of the course you have plotted out for yourself. There is no set formula that can tell you when it will take a dip or when it will end. No one will ever know for sure what the future does hold, nor will we always understand why things happen when they do. That is not what its about. Life is about living in that one moment, its about feeling each and everything second  as it happens. There is a balance which means that to feel all that really good you need to experience the bad. You will know when something is that good because you have seen life when its really bad.

And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.– Abraham Lincoln